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Our school, being the controlling body that it is, feels the need to notify parents of a student’s absence, no matter what the class or how many times. A kind automated message is sent home so that your parents can take the appropriate grounding action. In my case, yesterday I picked up the phone to such a call (and no, I was not absent or ditching any classes that day) and this is what I heard:

“Your son or daughter has been absent from one or more classes to day. Here is some more information about the incident:
‘The student in question is a 12th grade caucasian male, missing from class period 0.'”

Now does that sound like a police report or what? “Caucasian male?” “Incident?” Well, I didn’t know that a teacher’s error could be taken so seriously!